Take Responsibility

Dogs, like kids, don't know what you don't teach them.

Imagine this: You're in a public place (say, a library) and there's a kid running around, climbing on things, and yelling or screaming. The caretake is either not in sight, or following the child around at a much slower pace, occasionally saying things like "Billy, no, come here, you can't do that here, Billy, come on. You're in so much trouble, mister, we're going to have a talk."

Now imagine a dog doing it.

A lot of dog owners I see laugh off their dog's behavior if the dog is barking, pulling, or jumping around.  They say things like "oh, I can't control him" or "I can't make him stop."  Well yes, you can.  You can teach him a different thing to do.  You can reward things other than the behaviors you don't like, and after awhile, it won't be worth it for the dog to keep doing the "bad" things.

A child, unlike a dog, has the benefit of understanding English.  Before you go someplace, you can say "Now, Billy, when we go inside, you need to stay with me, and use a quiet voice."  A dog, you can't.  A dog, you have to anticipate a behavior you don't want, and head it off.  But a child and a dog aren't so different in that, if you set them up to succeed and then reward them, they'll want to repeat the rewarding behavior.  They'll think "Well, if I was so great at the library, and I got books, maybe I'll try that other places and see what else I'll get!"  Is bribing kids wrong?  I'm not really sure.  I also don't remember running around public places and screaming, because I don't think the adults who were with me let me do such a thing.  When I'm in public with Elka, I don't let her jump on people, and if she's inclined to bark (this is rare), I react immediately and redirect her attention.  

This is my responsibility.  This is your responsibility.  

New behaviors take time.  Sometimes things seem like they're "not working", when really, they're making their way through the system.  There's this little frustrating thing called an "extinction burst" (defined here on Karen Pryor's web site), where a behavior, before it disappears, increases dramatically.  One last hurrah, as it were, where the dog (or child) tries the behavior again frantically, because it always used to work.  They used to get something out of it.  When it's gone, though, it's gone.  Unless you drop the ball.